5 Secrets For Enduring Success in Life – #3 Build Yourself
In the first article in this series, 5 Secrets For Enduring Success in Life – #1 Be Yourself, I talked about the importance of learning to love and accept yourself just as you are. And I reminded you to empower and love yourself because you are FLAWESOME!!!
In last week’s article, 5 Secrets For Enduring Success in Life – #2 Bet on Yourself, I challenged you to go a little further and bet on yourself! I urged those of you who’ve never bet on yourselves to get started and I encouraged those of you who haven’t hit on success yet, to keep betting.
In today’s article, I want to awaken your inner champion because it’s time to build yourself and unleash your “Amazing“!
We are our worst critic
We have been our own worst critic since the beginning of time. Sometimes, we can be down right ruthless with ourselves. In fact if we talked to others the way we talk to ourselves, most of us wouldn’t have any friends at all.
I struggled with my ruthless inner critic for a long time. In my younger years, I was teased a lot by my peers because of my dark complexion, my size, my hair texture and my accent. I was told that I was not beautiful, not attractive and definitely not good enough. Their collective voices along with that of negative experiences created the dominant message of my inner critic. And boy was she ruthless!
For years, I lived under the influence of those voices and accepted their narration as gospel. I mean after all, if “THEY” said it, it must be true, right? I know this may sound ridiculous. Who in their right mind, would let the opinions of others shape their identity? Their reality? Their future? No one, right? Don’t most of us get over this stuff when we become adults?
The reality is, many of us still struggle with these voices even as adults. And worst, some of us have gotten so accustomed to the voice of our inner critic that we’ve forgotten that of our inner champion and lost sight of our “Amazing“.
The voice of your inner critic
Your inner critic does an excellent job at holding you back and keeping you in fear by making you:
- Doubt yourself and your abilities even though you know you are capable of achieving great things in life.
- Admire others for their achievements without being able to acknowledge your own. You might take your own accomplishments for granted, thinking that “Anyone could have done it,” or attributing them to luck or other people who gave you chances to succeed.
- Procrastinate. You might put important things on hold instead of just doing them.
- Feel stressed and anxious when trying to achieve something important to you.
- Worry excessively about what other people think of you. You might fear they will think less of you if you fail.
- Take things personally or let others put you down.
- Stay in an unhealthy relationship with someone, or stop you from starting a new relationship because of the risk of getting hurt.
- Stay stuck in a job you don’t like or even hate, afraid that changing it might not bring enough money or success.
If any of the above sound like you, then this article is written with you in mind. My goal in this article is to help awaken your inner champion. I want to breathe some oxygen into her lungs and activate her roar!!! It’s time to embrace and own your “Amazing“!!!
5 ways to build yourself and unleash your “Amazing“:
Molly Mahar’s article, the 12 Rules of Inner Confidence was the inspiration for this piece. In her article, she claims that life gets easier when you genuinely feel an inner confidence. Not cocky self-absorption or a fake-it-til-you-make-it attitude, but true comfort in your skin, radiant openness with others, and an understanding of your uniqueness.
Based on her 12 rules, here are 5 ways to silent the voice of your inner critic, build your inner champion and unleash your “Amazing“!
1. Step into your personal power
Personal power is not about using force or manipulation to overcome, but rather, it’s about realizing your natural state of goodness. It’s about trusting your worth. It’s about harnessing your inner strength and confidence to make a positive difference in the world by simply being yourself.
You have incredible power living inside you. Perhaps you don’t feel it yet. Perhaps your natural radiance is muddied up with years of bottling your own opinions, of trying not to offend, of working desperately to shore up your “weaknesses” instead of expanding your innate talents.
However, when you channel the voice of your champion and challenge the voice of your critic, you will tap into your inner power and unleash your inner “Amazing“!
2. Stop Trying To Measure Up To Others
Our brains have a natural tendency to make comparisons as a system of developing logic and reasoning. And all the ways we compare ourselves to others are the same ways we find value in our lives. However, when we feel we don’t measure up to others, that kind of comparison is generally a fast track to unhappiness. It’s a recipe for misery and it doesn’t build confidence. All it does is keep you focused on what you don’t like about yourself and your life.
The answer isn’t to stop making comparisons, but to avoid measuring our happiness and worth based on how we measure up to another. To get some tips on how to stop trying to measure up to others, check out an article I wrote on the subject a few months ago – Five Tips To Help You Stop Trying To Measure Up To Others.
3. Concentrate on your strengths
You are blessed with strengths. When explored and nurtured, they can be used to achieve inner confidence and activate your “Amazing“. Expression of your strengths makes you feel like your real self. It will invigorate and excite you! It will make you crave more ways to use those strengths!
And wouldn’t you agree that concentrating on your strengths is much more fun than trying to force yourself to become better at things you suck at?
Although your strengths may come naturally, you will still need to make the choice to use them. Even if you are naturally creative, or brave, or diligent, or playful, or fair, you must still craft your life so you get the chance to express your “Amazing” on a daily basis.
4. Celebrate the little things
As adults, we tend to shy on the side of underwhelm. It’s not cool to be excited about your favorite movie making a comeback or the fact that your grocery store is finally carrying gluten free bread. It’s not hip to dance around in celebration of your toddler finally using the potty on his own.
We bottle our emotions or only share complaints because it’s soooooo much more acceptable to be critical or sarcastic than to be enthusiastic.
Allowing yourself to go gaga for date night, an amazing line in your favorite marvel movie, the sound of your favorite song while on the dance floor, or your brand new business card, feeds your childlike soul. Showing enthusiasm towards anything is a gift to you — a way to guarantee that you won’t fall into the current culture of apathy.
Apathy is destroying our joy and causing us to live a passionless life. Kick it to the curb and let the little things make you jump for joy. Why don’t you try it now. What have you got to be excited about?
5. Celebrate the “Amazing” of others
When you are gracefully confidant in your own gifts and ways of expressing yourself in this world, you can celebrate the “Amazing” of everyone around you without feeling threatened or lacking. You can cheer your competitors on! You can celebrate the wins of your colleagues! You can have genuine admiration for the brilliant ideas of your peers! You can appreciate the genius of your partner!
When you truly celebrate the “Amazing” of others, you are sending the message to yourself that you deserved to be celebrated as well. When you appreciate someone’s compassion, creativity, or productivity, you’ll discover compassion, creativity and productivity in your own life.
“What we notice and celebrate in others will show up more often in our own world.” – Molly Mahar is a coach, speaker, and writer.
It is inspiring to know that you really can do something to make yourself stronger on the inside. The secret to happiness and enduring success is accepting that you cannot change outside circumstances or people. That is why it is imperative to accept and feel empowered by the realization that the only thing you can do is build yourself. It’s where you will find your super power. It’s where you will find your “AMAZING“!!!
Are you ready to find your AMAZING? If so, we can help. Sign up for our CEO of YOU consulting program and get the tools you need to achieve you the success you deserve. Click on the link below to sign up.
Stay tuned next week for secret to enduring success #4 – Brand yourself! Until then, remember to Dream Big, Take Risks and become the CEO of YOU™!