The 7 Secrets of a Confident Woman: Secret #3 – A confident woman does not LIVE in fear.

The 7 Secrets of a Confident Woman: Secret #3 – A Confident Woman Does Not LIVE in Fear

Fear has always been the great enemy of success. More people are held back by fears than by any other factor. Fear is a tricky human emotion—it can paralyze you, keep you from your dreams, and make you feel small. Yet fear, in the right doses, can also keep you safe. Fear is not the enemy; it’s the overwhelming presence of fear that can hold you back. A confident woman knows this truth and chooses to dance with her fear, not live in it.

Many people don’t recognize the impact of fear in their lives because they use different words to describe it—words like worry, nervousness, stress, shyness, or anxiety. But no matter what you call it, fear can be a silent yet powerful force shaping your decisions, actions, and even your potential.

Fear is often sneaky, hiding behind everyday situations. Fear of failure, rejection, making mistakes, criticism, expressing your opinion, or asking for what you want are just a few examples of how fear can slip into your life.

But here’s the good news: Not all fear is harmful. In fact, there are two types of fear—Rational Fear and Irrational Fear—and the key is learning to differentiate between the two.

Rational Fear: Your Safety Net

Rational fear serves a protective purpose. It’s the instinct that tells you to look both ways before crossing the street or to be cautious in dangerous situations. This kind of fear is rooted in our survival instinct, ensuring self-preservation. It’s like an internal safety net, guiding you away from real threats and keeping you safe.

Irrational Fear: The Stumbling Block

On the other hand, irrational fear is the kind that can hold you back. This type of fear is often based on “what ifs” and worst-case scenarios—“What if I fail?” “What if they reject me?” These thoughts create the same physical responses as rational fear—your heart races, your breath quickens, and you feel anxious—but there’s no immediate danger. Instead, this fear is rooted in your imagination, keeping you stuck and stagnant.

The Goal: Manage Fear, Don’t Eliminate It

The goal isn’t to eliminate fear altogether. Fear is part of the human experience, and it’s not going anywhere. What matters is learning how to manage it. Confident women don’t let fear rule their lives; they acknowledge it, understand it, and choose to move forward despite it.

Here are three tips to help you manage your fears:

1. Embrace Your Fears

Start by getting clear on what you’re truly afraid of. Sometimes our fears are like onions, with layers upon layers to peel away. Instead of ignoring your fear, see it as a fire alarm alerting you to check something out. Embrace it, explore it, and let it guide you toward action rather than inaction.

2. Do It Afraid

One of my favorite quotes says, “Courage, confidence, and even fearlessness are the result of facing, embracing, and dancing with fear.” The people who succeed in life aren’t the ones without fear—they’re the ones who step forward in spite of it. So, do it afraid. Confidence isn’t the absence of fear; it’s the willingness to move forward even when fear is present.

3. Let Go of the Illusion of Control

Recognize that there’s so much in life that you cannot control. You can’t control what others say or do, and you certainly can’t control the future. What you can control are your actions and choices in the present moment. When you let go of the need to control everything, you free yourself from the grip of fear. Life becomes more about adapting, learning, and growing.

Nelson Mandela on Fear

I want to leave you with one of my favorite quotes on fear. It’s a reminder that the light within us is far greater than the shadows fear casts:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?… Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you…As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – Nelson Mandela

Face Everything and Rise

When you think of fear, choose to Face Everything And Rise. Choose to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous. Choose to be an Optometry Diva! Don’t play small and don’t shrink into fear. Instead, be confident, bold, and take steps to change your world!

Let’s Empower, Connect, and Promote a Stronger, More Confident YOU!

Join Us

If you enjoyed this article, be confident about it—share it, comment on it, and let others know! Join us at OptometryDivas.com for exclusive content, resources, and a supportive community of like-minded women who are committed to growing in confidence and success.

Click HERE to join us today and be part of a thriving community dedicated to empowering women in optometry!