5 Secrets For Enduring Success in Life – #1 Be Yourself
“Success is a choice, and I make that choice every day!” — Dr. Lauretta Justin
Many of us, at some point, have acted like someone we are not. Whether it was to impress a love interest, a boss, a colleague, or a family member, we’ve all tried to be someone else, hoping it would lead to acceptance. However, trying to please others often leads to losing our authenticity. Aesop’s fable of the man, his son, and their donkey beautifully illustrates the folly of trying too hard to meet everyone’s expectations: in the end, the man loses what matters most by attempting to satisfy everyone.
Like the man in the fable, many of us fall into the trap of people-pleasing. We change ourselves out of fear of rejection, but the more we do, the less authentic we become, which can actually lead to more rejection. The truth is, if you want to feel truly accepted, you must be yourself. Those who matter will accept the real you, and those who don’t were never meant to.
In a recent article on Forbes.com, the author outlines 10 signs that show you’re trying too hard to please everyone. Here are the first five:
- You pretend to agree with everyone – It’s fine to listen politely to others’ opinions, but pretending to agree just to be liked compromises your own values.
- You feel responsible for how other people feel – While your behavior can influence others, it’s important to remember that everyone is responsible for their own emotions.
- You apologize often – Constantly apologizing, whether out of guilt or fear of blame, can be a sign of deeper insecurity. You shouldn’t feel sorry for being yourself.
- You feel burdened by the things you have to do – People-pleasers often fill their schedules with tasks they think others want them to do, losing control over their own time.
- You can’t say no – Whether you follow through on commitments or find excuses to back out later, being unable to say “no” will prevent you from achieving your goals.
If these signs resonate with you, it’s time to take steps toward self-acceptance. Here are five quotes from Medium.com that can help guide you on that journey:
- Focus on your positive qualities
“When you focus on being the best person you can be, you draw the best possible life, love, and opportunities to you.” — Germany Kent - Consciously prevent negative thinking patterns
“If you are positive, you’ll see opportunities instead of obstacles.” — Widad Akrawi - Accept your imperfections
“It’s not about hiding your imperfections on a shoot; it’s about embracing them and being unapologetic about them.” — Erin O’Connor - Use positive self-talk
“The way you choose to think and speak about yourself IS A CHOICE! You may have spent your whole life talking about yourself in a negative way, but that doesn’t mean you have to continue that path.” — Miya Yamanouchi - Disregard what others think about your decisions
“I don’t listen to what people say about me and I don’t read what they write about me. People can compare me to anyone they want to, but I’m not going to worry about it.” — Eric Davis
Being yourself doesn’t mean you’re selfish or that you don’t care about others. It simply means you accept and love who you are, and you choose to live according to your own values. While it’s important to respect others’ values, this should never come at the expense of your own.
In conclusion
Don’t let the fear of what others think dictate your life. You can’t control their thoughts or opinions, but you can control how you see yourself. Learning to love and accept yourself just as you are will empower you. When you embrace your flaws and strengths alike, you become truly FLAWESOME!
If people-pleasing is holding you back and affecting your success, we can help. Join our mastermind group for peer-to-peer support and guidance to achieve your goals. Click the link below to sign up today.
Stay tuned for next week’s secret to enduring success — #2 Bet on Yourself! Until then, remember to Dream Big, Take Risks, and become the CEO of YOU™!
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